i fucking always type out long ass entries and just delete them. what the fuck.

bottom line? i think i'm done with this slump of mine..

777777777 line 5 ; server lock ; codex 35239056843920814mg ...... load prog 32 - sys 3 ; UNLOCK #B# #T# buil ...... successful enter trans -

they've begun to depl

436


3849860938463 reset? y/n


......enter trans -


they've begun . worse than expec http://www.karinya.com/images/acturianship1.jpg 232285858img33 trans END .... end

alvee's right, livejournal is really lame now. so this is me doing my part to keep the flame alive. i've felt really indifferent lately. about school, work, life in general i guess. i could just run in circles about the stuff i've talked about many times in my entries, but rhetoric can only accomplish so much. i'm not saying that i'm throwing in the towel with it all, but i feel like the time for me to be that change i want to see in the world becomes more immediate everyday. with that, i'm still trying to enjoy myself as much as possible in the present, yet trying to progress as a human being in general, too. i still become terrified of the future every so often, and i don't know if i can ever shake that. which sucks. but each time i start to feel like that, i've been able to take how i feel and transfer it into some serious creativity. which is a really good feeling. i have to get ready for class. this has been a strange entry, but i kind of like how it was coming out so fuck y'all.


edit - i miss a lot of people. i hope all of you guys that i don't see a lot are just enjoying yourselves right now. alright see ya.

i sometimes plea for the world to be as motivated as possible.

so i was reading an article in game informer before and it got me really thinking about rock band/guitar hero. all in all, fuck those games. i feel like they're just breeding a new generation of kids that are gonna have a lesser understanding of what it is to truly make music. they're definitely fun as hell, don't get me wrong. but forreal? in my opinion, all they'll really do is add to the extreme laziness that so many people already suffer from. it just seems like everything is becoming more and more based around doing as little as possible. is the fate of the chord to be represented by the push of a button? fuck that. go buy a god damn guitar at a thrift store like the old days and start a real band you little bitches. and if you don't play a guitar? that's no excuse. start a ska band. just don't sit inside all day and try and get perfect on 'through the fire and flames.' the rock gods are up there somewhere, shaking their heads..correct me if i'm wrong.

How often do you currently use cocaine, crack or other illegal drugs (LSD, speed, amphetamines, ice, etc.) while at work or just before?

"A billion people died on the news tonight
But not so many cried at the terrible sight
Well mama said
It's just make believe
You can't believe everything you see
So baby close your eyes to the lullabies
On the news tonight"

this song kinda fits how i felt today while i was at the dentist watching the news...it can be really depressing seeing all of the awful stories that fill newspapers and tv stations. maybe that's why i've been in a shitty mood all day. or maybe it's because my parents found out i'm unemployed. or maybe it's just because i was at the dentist in the first place. either way. not a fun day. how does the beach sound to everybody on friday? i need a pick me up. still just makin' music. music music music.

ps, alvee. i hope your blog ends up being awesome. but when you're sipping on the hard stuff with p. diddy, don't forget about bill cosby...

i just had a weird thought. kind of random and philosophical but oh well. i started thinking about all of the issues that society is faced with. not even just in today's day and age but all throughout history. like the ongoing existence of racism, diseases for which cures have not been found, etc. things of that caliber. and of course these things are bad and cause a lot of anguish and despair...but. without the existence of the negative, it's almost like there'd be nothing there to drive someone to better themselves or the world. i feel like living in a world without bad things would leave people content with the mediocre and without a drive to rise above. because there would be nothing to rise above. shit, it feels like there's too much of people accepting mediocrity as it is. i guess you could go on to talk about god and whatever, too, but i always end up running in circles there. alright that's all. oh yeah, and i put up a bunch of the beats i've worked on up on myspace..it'd be cool if you guys checked them out and told me what you thought or something. i'm kind of proud of some of the stuff. http://www.myspace.com/goosebeatz

okay. later.

"as I spy from behind my giant robot's eyes
I keep him happy 'cause I might fall out if he cries
Scared of heights so I might pass out if he flies
Keep him on autopilot 'cause I can't drive
Room enough for one I tell my homies they can't ride
Unless they sittin on the shoulders but that's way too high
Let's try not to step on the children
The news cameras filmin
This walkin project buildin
Now there's hoes sellin hoes like right around the toes
And the crackheads beg at about the lower leg
There's crooked police that's stationed at the knees
And they do drive-bys like up and down the thighs
And there's a car chase goin on at the waist
Keep a vest on my chest
I'm sittin in my room as I'm lookin out the face
Somethin to write about
I still got some damage from fightin the whitehouse, just a daydream"

feel like this says enough though -

i've come to realize that life is a matter of being content with where you are right now. i've always had trouble looking back on times that i know were awesome and asking myself, "damn. where'd the time go?" but when you're on a ride that doesn't stop for shiiit, all you can truly do is make the most out of where you're at. 'cause really, what can you do? by pondering the questions of life and death too much, you leave yourself open for time to pass you by without any remorse.


"you tell me time never waits, that's okay 'cause i don't wait for time."

i realized that i can talk as much as i want about my dreams and aspirations but until i can make shit happen words mean nothing. you can't expect the world to turn in your favor unless you take action yourself.

one more week of school. it's on this summer.

A:

Ants are not very fast, that is true but actually if every living thing, people, animals and insects were the same size the ant would be the fastest thing on earth.

Ants are not very fast.
They go about one inch every 2 seconds.
This factor depends on if the ant is carrying anything. (food etc.)



..Just pushing off this stupid paper.

i just started thinking about a show that would be awesome. instead of charles in charge, it's called chan in charge. and it's just some asian guy named chan. and his awesome life.


edit - this awesome guy is indeed jackie chan. also, 80 degrees today? what? idk if can even finish school if the weather is gonna be like this. seriously

i haven't posted anything lately, so i figured i'd give you guys an update of my life as of late. like you care though, right? at this point i use livejournal simply to keep up on my friend's lives that i don't see too much during school, but what kind of friend would i be not to do the same in return? for the record, alvee, your entries are still the best. whether it be a ridiculous dream entry, to a rant about porn, you speak truths that many others are afraid to speak. and for that, i give you major props. anyways. this semester is a month away from being over. and to be honest, aside from one class, i've got it by the ballz(knock on wood). just gotta keep the work ethic going for a bit more, then i want to see nothing but madness until september. seriously. let's fuckin' go crazy everybody. alright i typed out some more after that about turning 21 and shit but fuck it, bottom line let's just have fun.

..yeah. i'm about done with kanye for now.

"And when you wake up
everything is gonna be fine
I guarantee that you wake in a better place
in a better time
So you're tired of living
feel like you might give in
well don't
it's not your time"


still awesome.